Manners and Behavior

A friend just commented on Facebook about a lady's comment on how well she disciplines her children...then about a reaction she had to a disagreement between her twin daughters. Would the lady think she disciplined well if she had heard that? I found this to be an interesting topic.

I often get compliments on how well behaved or mannered my boys are in public. I think to myself at those times "If they only knew!" If they only knew that at home the oldest and youngest are constantly at each other's throats or that their rooms look like disaster areas. Don't get me wrong, I think my kids are great (if I do say so myself). But they didn't get that way by accident. Those times when the discipline at home isn't exactly what others would think is appropriate is what made those times when they are well behaved in public possible.

I see too many kids these days who have no manners in public. But I try real hard to teach mine the way to behave in public. How? Let me give you a few examples:

1.) Holding doors for people. This is one thing I am working on with my kids. I can't tell you how much it irritates me for my boys to let a door fall on anyone walking behind them. I try to tell them to make sure there is no one behind them before they let a door close. One way I do this is to MAKE them hold the door for me. Get ahead of me, open the door, hold it until I am through it and them make sure no one is behind them before it closes. I also make sure that I hold doors for people as well. I cannot expect my boys to do what I won't.

2.) Yes ma'am/sir, No ma'am/sir. For the most part, my kids say 'yes ma'am, no ma'am; yes sir, no sir' without any prompting from me. It hasn't always been that way. But they are getting better. I make sure that I say those things as well. I believe that it shows respect for anyone, not just our elders. I correct them when I hear that they don't say it hoping that when I am around they do.

3.) Just in general, being gentlemen. This is the most important thing to me. That they behave like gentlemen. They pick up things people have dropped, they help up kids that have fallen.

They are becoming gentlemen.

I know this sounds a little gratuitous on my part, but I am proud of my children. I have a 16-year-old who does not talk back to me. How awesome is that? He's not rude to me, he's not hateful. He helps around the house, does his own laundry, makes good grades, works...he generally never gives me a problem. I am truly blessed.